holidays and tumblr

First off I hope that everyone's Thanksgivings were great, or that your weekends were awesome if you don't live in the US. The holidays are always crazy around here because both Mike and my parents are divorced so there are FOUR different places to go and FOUR different families to spend time with. The amount of love is amazing but also very time consuming for this little mommy to be. There have also been a few days where I have been so worn out that I feel like I have a cold. Then I wake up and feel totally fine. Isn't that weird? I am sure it's just my bodies way of telling me to slow down.

After moving twice, starting and quiting three jobs, getting pregnant and dealing with everyday stresses life is hopefully going to slow down here for awhile. Our apartment is still all cluttered with our insane amount of stuff that we will never use. This week I am hoping to get it all cleaned out and then decorate for Christmas!!! Which is my favorite time of the year of course. Oddly enough I date the biggest Grinch in the world. This turns out amusing every year because I am always determined to overwhelm his bahhumbugness with Christmas cheer. And yes every year I win and this year I plan on doing the same thing!

Posting may still be a bit slow around here for a bit longer till things fully settle down but in the mean time I have been trying to post a photo or two on my tumblr which you can check out here if you would like. Once a week I will try to post all of them on here. Most of them are bad quality pictures from my handy little phone but it's a fun glimpse into my every day life. Here are a few that I have posted so far.

Hope all is well with everyone there out in blogland. If you are new to this blog leave your link so I can check out your blog!

xo,
Casey

holidays wishlist!

The boy asked me to put together a list of things that I would like for my birthday and Christmas this year. I'm a Christmas baby born only 6 days before! Which sadly makes it harder on my family so I normally get a Christmas/Birthday present which is totally fine. I lovveee the holidays! So now here it is!

A nice point and shot camera, mine broke so it would be nice!

Or this lovely camera would be oh so fun!

I want these postcards to frame and put on my wall!

Various plugs from these guys! They make such pretty stuff.

I've wanted this paper doll set for my book corner forever:

There is a ton more on the actual list but I will spare you from all of it.

What do you want for Christmas this year?

xoxo,
Casey

Dallas Clayton

The Papa Bear just called me downstairs to show me this awesome children book author that he found through one of his favorite skateboarding websites. His name is Dallas Clayton and this is some of this work.

We plan on ordering both of his books for the baby bear. Check out his website and buy his books here. Time for me to get back to cleaning!
-Casey

Its a boy!

It's a boy! His name is Ivan Joseph Dougher. And if you were wondering the first image that comes up when you google Ivan is this...

And yes I find that very amusing.

Mike and I are so excited. He spent all of yesterday making up songs that consisted of "we are having a boy" over and over again. The ultrasound took forever and I am pretty sure that the lady doing it hated me and there will be bruises popping up any time now. She was irritated that he was hiding his little face behind his hands every time she tried to get a picture. Yup thats my boy!

Now it's time for laundry and Chinese food. Saturday evenings are exciting here!

-Casey

a letter to my 16 year old self

Inspired by Danielle and all of the #tweetyour16yearoldself tweets I wrote a letter to my 16 year old self. All of the tweets would have been overwhelming. Sadly time travel isn't real because I really could have used this letter back then.

Dear 16 year old self,

I know things are hard and you don't think you can do it anymore. You can. In a few years you will be the strongest, toughest girl you know so just hold on. Don't let your parents bad decisions make you feel confused and angry because in the end you will love them more for it. That lady you never hear from, you know, your Mother. Some day soon she will step up to the plate and save the day, then she wont stop doing that for the rest of your life. She will start showing up,  no more waiting or disappointment. Some day you will understand and learn from her mistakes.

Don't let boys get you down. You are beautiful and never fat and always better than them. I mean come on step back and look at the situation. In about a year you will meet one that will seem like the end all be all, you will fall in love and he will break your heart. But thats ok, it's part of what makes you stronger plus he becomes a waste case so don't beat yourself up too bad about it. I know it doesn't seem like it but you will find "the one" and the journey to figure that out will last roughly 5 years. It will all work out I promise. Someday you will be a happy little part time house wife who is 18 weeks pregnant with your first child. Just pay better attention when you go to Montreal.  Get it? Yeah I know but believe me you both change alot and it works so well now, oh and yes he moves back to America so that helps.

Let them come to you. Both with friends and boys. The heartache from both will be horrible at times. Don't let them get to you. Don't be friends with girls named Sarah or Karen. If someone does something horrible don't put up with it. Stop lying. I know it's hard but someday you will not lie about anything and it will also get you into trouble but a lot less believe me.

Stay in school, go to class, don't go to Oneonta go to the community college. Never stop drawing, never stop painting, never stop taking photographs, NEVER stop reading. I know walking into a school just gives you anxiety, so just stop and take a few deep breaths, remember why you are there and how much debit sucks. Learn to bake from scratch it will blow all anxiety out of the way. Just give away most of the baked goods because yes you will bake that much. Don't take ap chem its way to hard you hate chemicals. Take ap bio you can legally get out of cutting up a cat I promise. Work so hard in high school it will be worth it. Plus you will regret how horrible you did in your last year forever.

One last thing. Always believe in yourself. You are a fantastic person with a million awesome ideas. Write them all down, take a lot of pictures. Enjoy every moment of your life because it will be awesome. You will learn to love everything you hate. Living alone will be the best part of your life, besides being pregnant, so cherish it. Don't be afraid of silence or new things. And remember I love you.

Can't wait till you're me,
23 year old Casey

boy or girl?

 or?

Tomorrow is the day! At 1:50pm we will be taking the journey to the doctor's office to find out if we are having a girl or a boy. We have picked out names for both and are split on what we want. Mikey wants a boy super bad and I want a girl. Come on have you seen some of the cute little dresses they have out there?!  This evening I had some fun and took a few of those silly what are you having quizes
2 said girl and 1 said boy. Either way we will be so happy to see that cute little face on the screen tomorrow. Just like last time I am sure I'll cry so hard that the lady will have trouble getting a good picture, silly hormones! I'll hopefully get some time to update tomorrow! Wish us luck.

-Casey

16 weeks

Week 16. Time is flying. Names have been picked out for both boy and girl. November 5th we find out! Feeling tired, getting some gnarly headaches and stressing about life. But all is well and I am so excited to be a mommy! We love out little baby bear already.

<3

by the lake

Some day we will live by a lake.

viaweheartit.

love

I have fallen in love. With a crib bedding set.

It's gender neutral enough for me!

Thank you Pottery Barn Kids!
xoxo,
Casey

mom's suprise party

Earlier this month I drove up to my moms house which is 3 hours away. My stepfather Charlie had planned this big surprise party for her 51st birthday. She was slightly suspicious so I drove straight to their house about an hour before the party. This way she thought that I was the surprise. She was so funny when I just walked into the house in the middle of a Sunday, I wish I could see that look on her face more often! After we settled in we all drove to the place were her party was. She thought we were just going to dinner and couldn't figure out why Charlie was driving so slow, we left a bit early so he was stalling. The restaurant that the party was at is this old hotel in the middle of nowhere in the Adirondacks that is only open during the summer and fall but my mom loves it to death. When we walked in the owner, who is the cutest old lady ever, ran over and grabbed my mom and stared leading her out back. Now the mom knew something was out. Outside there were tons of tables set up with all of her friends and a tent with tons of food and cake. She was so surprised it was wonderful to see. The turnout was great, there were people there that she hasn't seen in 2 years! All in all it was a lovely relaxing evening and I am so glad I went.

A view from a stop on the way up. I've been told that I shouldn't drive for long periods of time without stopping and walking around. With this sort of view it's hard to be upset about it.

The mom and the cake.

The party towards the end when people had left. It was so nice out that day!

Crappy picture on the way home, but sooo happy!

In a few years we plan on picking up and moving up north that way. I can't wait to show up at my mom's house and have it not be a suprise!

xoxo,
Casey

new jobber

Due to being all knocked up I have had some trouble at my job. Not like they are mad or anything. I just can't do my job anymore. Baking bread involves me picking up 50lb or more bins of dough for hours starting at 3 or 4 am. My doctor told me not to lift anything over 25lbs and I just couldn't keep up with the hours. After each shift I would feel terrible. Being that there was not another position for me to fill there I had to go out and find me a part time job. Guess where I found one?

JoAnn Fabric! All day I will be surrounded by fabric and crafty goodness. So excited! Plus we get free classes so you know I will be taking advantage of that offer! They even have part time insurance. I have to sit down and figure out if it will be worth it but if it is that would be fantastic! So far I have trained in the cutting counter and really loved it. The manager called me today to tell me that I will be mainly working there. It's a lot less like you are working a corporate job when you have your hands on the fabric all day and get to talk to customers about their projects. Plus you get to use these sweet little hand held computers. So fun.

I still won't be working full time so I am going to try to make some stuff to sell on etsy like I have always wanted to. Just have to narrow down all of my crazy ideas into something people will want to buy!


Happy weekend everyone!
-Casey

baby questions!

Thank you so much everyone for your kind words on my last post. It means so much to me to know I am not alone. These hormones are killing me over here. It doesn't help that our friends aren't very supportive. They all seem to not be into the idea of us having a kid. Almost like it's going to make us less fun and they will never see us again. Which is not true at all! But oh well life goes on. We are happy to be starting a family and that is all that matters.

Now I need some advice. I have been doing some research on what we are going to need for the little bear. Our house is small so we don't want to end up with a million toys and bouncy chair things and clothing we will never use. So we are hoping to make a registry early so our family doesn't go too wild and buy us all of Babies-R-Us. They are all really really really excited about the baby and although we love them we just don't want them to go tooooo crazy.

What do the moms out there recommend getting? What couldn't you live without? And what did you never ever use? We are thinking about doing the gdiapers since you can do both cloth and disposable inserts and the disposable ones are much better for the environment. Anyone use those?

Thanks for your help! Any advice would be wonderful. We are rather clueless when it comes to all of this.

<3 Casey

scared

I am so nervous to become a Mother. To think that I will influence someone's life so drastically is scary. So many things are always running through my mind. Mainly what if I fuck it up? It's not like you can jump in a Delorean and fix it. Luckly all of those fears are over run by how excited I am. So soon I get to cuddle a little baby that I made with the man I love. Picnics, learning to ride a bike, movie nights, reading cute little kid books, tea parties, cupcakes, and constant hugs and kisses. April 8th 2011 can't get here fast enough!

via weheartit

Parents out there were you this scared before having your first child?

Time for bed, night everyone!
Casey

What I have been reading. pt 1

A few months ago I went on a trip up to my Mother's house. This lady has the largest book collection of any person that I know. So of course she sent me home with a million books to read! Here is a list of what I read over the summer. I will start with the first three now and then in a few days finish up with the last three!

I loved this book. It was a total tear jerker, my boyfriend thought I was dying at one point and ran into the room to check on me. At first I was afraid that it was going to be to lovey dovey for me, but it turned out to be just the right amount of loveyness. Oh and don't bother watching the movie after you read it. Like me you will just be angry.

Didn't read Twilight? Don't want to give in to the vampire trend. Don't worry there isn't a single vampire in this book. Stephenie Meyer's website describes it as "science fiction for people who don't like science fiction" and I couldn't say it better. Now as a firm lover of all things science fiction (and reader of the Twilight series, don't judge me!) I didn't even realize that this was science fiction for awhile. A fantastic book, readable even for people who hate her other stuff I promise.

When my mom gives me a book to read I don't read the description at all. It's fun going into a book not knowing what it's going to be about. With this one I got all sorts of confused for about the first half of the book as to what the hell was going on. Then I figured it out and realized that wasn't a bad thing. I definitively recommend this book if you are looking for something different to read. Brockmeir's writing was almost refreshing to me. After I had finished it I was excited that I had read it which is rare. Normally after finishing books I have to sit for a minute and think about what I just read. This one was like a breath of fresh air.

What did you read over the summer? Anything you would recommend?

-Casey

13 weeks today!

"Your Baby in Week 13 of Pregnancy
What's up with your baby? Well, besides being as large as a peach now, that big old noggin of hers is now about half the size of her crown-to-rump length (that’s one reason why your little peach looks more like an alien from outer space at this point). By the time you give birth, her body will catch up, measuring three-quarters of her total size. What else is going on in there? Tiny bones are beginning to form in her arms and legs, the intestines are beginning to move from the umbilical cord to the abdomen, and the vocal cords are well under construction (the first step toward saying, "I love you, Mommy!"). And because she can move her arms and legs in a jerky fashion, she may be able to get her thumb into her mouth (a habit that may come in handy for self-soothing when she’s a newborn)." (from whattoexpect.com)

This week I am feeling pretty much the same. There is a tiny bit more pep in my step but otherwise still sleepy, and eating weird. I woke up this morning and Mike and I swear my tummy grew overnight. He is so funny, he will just stare at it all excited looking and say "my baby is in there!". I am so happy that he is just excited as I am. Most days he keeps me going when the tired moodieness takes over. I am so thankful for the life I have right now :)

xoxo,
Casey 

i made sadie a crazy cat lady sweater!

The poor little puppy is so cold! She is half toy poodle and half aussie terrier and whoever thought that was a good mix did not think it through. She has no meat on her bones like a poodle, unlike a poodle she does not have the right hair to keep her warm! Sadie spent the first two cold days hiding under a blanket, although cute it was sad so i made her a nice little sweater that looks like a crazy cat lady should be wearing it. She LOVES it. If she isn't wearing it and you pick it up she runs over to you and starts jumping up and down with excitement. Seems that I'll have to make her a few more, maybe even some little booties for when it snows.

We are having a bit of trouble with training her. The lady we got her from would leave Sadie in her kennel for 10 hours a day and only took her outside 3 times the whole 6 months she had her. Where did she go potty you ask? She goes on a piddle pad. And yes, it is very hard to train a dog to not go on a training pad. We also think that she was beaten before we got her. Anytime you raise your voice, use a negative tone or pick up a stick like object she gets really scared and runs into her kennel. I couldn't imagine the kind of person who would hit a 5 pound dog who constantly looks sad anyways!

Hopefully in the next few months we will get all of this worked out. For now we will love her with all of our hearts and show her that she will never be harmed again.

I love you Sadie!
-Casey K

best news ever!

I have some very exciting news to shout from a mountain top. Waiting to tell people this has been the hardest task ever. I am horrible at keeping my own secrets. Now that we are in the "safe part" I can do what I want!

We are 12 weeks and 5 days pregnant with our first child!

The ultrasound from 9 weeks 6 days. 

Both Mikey and I are beyond excited. Everything seems to be working out. We moved for the second time in two months about a month ago into a town house that has two bedrooms. Best part is the rent is still the same! Our last apartment was a fancy Victorian apartment with 15ft high ceilings and all original woodwork and such. This one is in the carriage house behind it and is a normal apartment so rent was all the same, same landlord even so we didn't have to put down a new security deposit!

Every week I am going to try to post whats going on with the baby and how I am feeling. I'll start it off with week 12!

Week 12-

"By now, your baby weighs a full half-ounce and is about the size of a large plum. Most of his systems are in place, though there's still plenty of maturing to do. For one thing, his fetal digestive system is beginning to practice contraction movements necessary for eating, and his bone marrow is busy making white blood cells — weapons against germs once he's out of your safe haven. The pituitary gland (at the base of the brain) has started producing the hormones that'll enable him (or her) to make babies of his (or her) own in a couple of decades or so" 
 (picture and quote from whattoexpect.com)

So far I have been crazy tired. I have a lot of trouble getting off the couch or out of bed most days. When I heard about this symptom I never imagined that it could be this bad! But I'm getting through it by telling myself that the apartment will get clean and organized soon and not to push myself too hard. My doctor and every book I have read keep telling me that I should be getting some energy back soon so some stuff can get done!

As for food I have been off and on again nausea (one week was really bad in the beginning). All of the foods I normally love totally gross me out. I went from eating super healthy to only wanting to eat anything that I ate when I was 8 years old. Baked ziti, tuna noodle casserole, sloppy joes, ham sandwiches, ranch dressing and hot dogs and mac & cheese. What is wrong with me! I can't make food either. Cooking totally grosses me out. Can't even get near raw meat. Lucky for me Mikey is a super good cook otherwise we would be screwed haha.

I'll try to get a belly picture soon! Our point and shot is broken and Mike can't figure out the rebel but it will come soon. Hope everyone is well.

-Casey Kirkland

going all natural... well mostly

The other day after getting sick of using so many chemicals on my body all of the time I went out and bought this little facial kit. It's sold in Target and it's called Yes To Tomatoes. There is also Yes To Cucumbers and To Carrots. The Tomato is for oily/combination skin, cucumber for dry and carrot for normal. After using it for a few days and doing the mask once my face already feels so much softer! Totally did not expect this! I've been breaking out really bad lately so I'm hoping that it helps me out with that after a week or so.

This product is 99.4% natural and a lot of the ingredients are organic. Now that I have tested out something that is not filled with harsh chemicals and ingredients I can't pronounce I am thinking more about how women these days just bathe themselves in unnatural weird chemicals all day long. It can't be good for us can it? We wonder why there is all of this cancer and horrible stuff going on. Look at what we use! From here on out I am trying my hardest to stay away from anything that isn't mostly natural. I realize that in some things I use it just can't be avoided, so no setting unreachable goals. As a former hair dresser saying no to hair spray will be a challenge. Maybe just for special occasions. I've already cut down on makeup and hair styling products. For makeup I wear some light cover up, a powder and mascara. And for my hair I use Paul Mitchell's Super Skinny Serum to help protect my hair.

Do any of you know of some good natural body products, or hair products? I would love to hear what you have used!

-Casey